Growing up in a big family often means sharing toys, clothes, and even a bedroom with siblings. As parents age, that responsibility is shared among family members, but for only children, it falls entirely on them, with no siblings to share the load.
There are, however, things you can do as an only child to prepare you and your parents for the future, whatever that may look like. In this article, we’ll provide practical advice for navigating the unique challenges of looking after your aging parents as an only child to ensure their well-being and your peace of mind.
How to Take Care of Aging Parents: Our Top Tips
When looking after aging parents, siblings typically work together, sharing responsibilities and supporting each other along the way. However, things work a little differently for only children, who manage the responsibility largely on their own. That’s why we’ve put together some helpful tips to make the journey a little easier—so you can ensure the best care for your parent/s while also looking after yourself.
Prepare Early
One of the most important steps in this journey is being prepared, and the best way to do so is by talking to your parents about their preferences and plans for the future. Start the conversation relatively early so you can gain a complete picture of their wishes and needs. We recommend exploring the following topics with your parent/s:
- Living Preferences – Where would you like to live when you get older? Do you want to stay at home, downsize, or move to a retirement community?
- Healthcare Wishes – What are your preferences for medical care? Are there specific treatments or care options you do or don’t want as you get older?
- Financial Planning – Do you have savings or a financial plan in place for medical care and daily living costs?
- Legal Matters – Is your will up to date? Do you have a power of attorney or an advance healthcare directive?
Having an open and ongoing conversation lets your parent/s know that you’re planning for the future and are considering their wishes and well-being. It’s important to approach this as a series of conversations rather than a one-time discussion.
This is because expecting to get all the information you need in one sitting can overwhelm your parent/s and potentially scare them away from the topic altogether. Bombarding them with too many questions at once can also be overwhelming, especially for parents with cognitive impairments, so take it one step at a time.
Find & Accept Help!
Being an only child doesn’t mean you have to face all of the responsibilities of caring for your aging parent all on your own. Accepting help from your partner or other family members who love you is a valuable way to ease the burden and ensure you and your parent/s are supported. While you may think you can handle it on your own, caregiving can be overwhelming, and having a strong support system can make a huge difference in your well-being and your parent’s quality of care.
Next, we recommend putting together a team of professionals based on your parents’ doctor’s suggestions. This might include home care aides, physiotherapists, social workers, or specialists like occupational therapists. Having the right people in place can ensure your parent/s gets the best care and give you peace of mind, knowing they’re in good hands.
Step Away When You Need To
Always—and we mean ALWAYS—take a break when you need to. Taking care of a loved one when you’re feeling drained is tough on both you and them, and stepping away for a bit can help you recharge and be there for them in the best way possible. Whether this means taking a day off and letting a professional carer take over or simply asking a friend or family member to help, taking a break is essential for your well-being and allows you to come back refreshed and with more energy in the tank.
Fill Your Own Cup
You can’t possibly fill someone else’s cup without having a full one yourself. So, making sure you have responsibilities and activities outside of taking care of your parent/s is super important. Our top tip is to put you and your health first because when you take care of yourself, you can better support those around you. Some things you can do to fill your cup are:
- Carve out time for hobbies and activities that bring you joy and allow you to unwind.
- Make time to stay connected with friends and family and maintain a solid support system.
- Prioritise getting enough rest so you’re physically and mentally refreshed for each day.
- Catch up on some exercise. Physical activity is a great way to relieve stress and boost energy levels.
- Make sure you’re eating well and nourishing yourself with foods that fuel your body.
Balancing Independence and Support at The Village Retirement Group
We understand that looking after older loved ones as an only child can be challenging, especially if they are stubborn about their care needs. At The Village Retirement Group, we provide the support your family needs in an environment that allows them to maintain their independence. Here, residents enjoy the privacy and freedom of their own home, villa, or apartment while being close to several support services, including on-site healthcare, social activities, and personal care assistance.
All too often, we’ve been asked, “How do you deal with aging parents who refuse help?” and we’re here to say: consider The Village Retirement Group. Here, your loved ones can receive the care and support they need while still maintaining the independence they cherish.
